I have, like every other mother, working or stay at home or a combination of the two, a never ending to do list. I have the urgent and important, the urgent but not important, important but not urgent, neither urgent nor important. The mundane, the repetitive, the painstaking, the time-consuming.
I also have three lovely, amazing children who are the dearest people in my life (behind my dear husband of course) and somehow, their needs, and by needs I mean playing Barbie’s and watching Lego building, fall into the important but not urgent category, and most times, get carried over from one list to the other.
“Tomorrow, honey, we’ll play CandyLand.”
My one great goal for 2014 is to change that. I “know” in my head my time with them as short. I “know” this is the only childhood they will ever have. I “know” I am going to miss this time of them being little. But that “knowing” doesn’t seem to reach my heart because I constantly put tasks and chores before relationship building.
I think the day to day urgent (get dressed, brush teeth, eat, get to school, buy groceries, pick up carpool, feed you again, homework, baths, supper, bedtime at a reasonable hour) numbs me to the important.
Connecting to my children’s hearts is both the most urgent and most important work I have to do in my day.
How am I going to work on prioritizing my children and those tasks that have no visible progress by which I judge my success in a day?
www.flylady.net
I am committing to her program, which systematically takes me through my home to declutter and clean, baby steps at a time. If all I get done is what Fly Lady tells me to do today, I will exhale and know the rest will get done in good time.
www.LoseIt.com
I am committing to log my food intake and exercise every day. It takes time to gain weight – the extra food stops in the kitchen, the lounging on the couch, trying on the entire closet before I leave the house – and it takes time to lose weight – extra workouts, calorie counting and meal planning and weighing out an ounce of chesse, obsessing over what the scale tells me today – and I have put in the time to lose it, I am at a happy weight. I want to eat the calories I need to stay here (or lose a little more) and exercise habitually but not excessively, and just be chill with this battle.
I don’t have time to waste. They are getting older everyday, everyday getting closer to letting go of my hand for good.
***update***
Flylady wasn't the right fit for me. Yes, she gives us step by step instructions, but they are often repetitive and I lost interest I guess. I still follow her on Facebook, she has great blog posts about decluttering and ideas for what to make for supper.
We also rearranged our living situation this spring, so thru that process the house got the once over. Started in March and lasted until Labor Day, and we all know how much fun seasons of transition are!
But I have been able to enjoy my children this year so far. My youngest decided to forever to pee in the potty and thus I have no more babies. Not hands free, by any means, but hands freer to fill my own cup and serve these munchkins with more of me, more of my attention, more of my heart.
-October 2014
